The Nap Time Diaries - #2
I have 15 minutes free to write before my next responsibility.
I think this is where moms tend to live, in the in between moments. We sneak a minute here to have a cookie. Or 10 minutes to listen to a podcast or "gods be praised" take a SHOWER!
I haven't gotten to do that yet today. Funny that I chose blogging over cleanliness.
Yesterday I got the boxes of Christmas decorations out. Simon and I opened the lid and I watched as he picked each little object and ornament up with complete awe and wonder. He would pick it up, observe it in his hand, and then lift it up to show me. Then put it back in the box and pick it up again.
It's fascinating. I don't know how many times in a day I wonder what he is thinking. It's basically a constant obsession. Sometimes it's completely clear because I have a very expressive child. He will be squealing with pure delight, or dramatically crying and throwing his body on the the ground, or nodding in absolute approval.
But it is in those moments where I can tell he is thinking and learning something new that I wonder about his thought process.
It is a completely unique experience to feel you know another human being from the inside out and yet they are still a complete mystery. I mean, this child GREW INSIDE ME! I literally felt him in my body and have known him more intimately and longer than anyone else on this planet will ever know him!
And even still, I don't know him at all.
Doesn't that tell us something? Doesn't that give us a clue that we are so much more than flesh and blood and personality? There is something beyond this world in each of us. Something deeper and more mysterious, wiser and more beautiful than we could ever understand.
I think it is a soul. But who knows how to really explain what it is.
I have a feeling that for the first time in my life, I'm really understanding what it is to love someone. What it is to love unconditionally, maybe the way we imagine God loves us.
Being a parent cracks your heart open and helps you to understand how precious each human life is, and how unique and mysterious we all actually are.
In the meantime, let me take a break from observing the divine to report that I cleaned up the most disgusting poop I've ever seen this morning. And it smelled like DEATH.
So that is the reality of parenting, brushing up against the great mystery of the divine spark in all of us, and the absolutely gross mundane reality of being human all at the same time.
Pretty cool.
xo
I think this is where moms tend to live, in the in between moments. We sneak a minute here to have a cookie. Or 10 minutes to listen to a podcast or "gods be praised" take a SHOWER!
I haven't gotten to do that yet today. Funny that I chose blogging over cleanliness.
Yesterday I got the boxes of Christmas decorations out. Simon and I opened the lid and I watched as he picked each little object and ornament up with complete awe and wonder. He would pick it up, observe it in his hand, and then lift it up to show me. Then put it back in the box and pick it up again.
It's fascinating. I don't know how many times in a day I wonder what he is thinking. It's basically a constant obsession. Sometimes it's completely clear because I have a very expressive child. He will be squealing with pure delight, or dramatically crying and throwing his body on the the ground, or nodding in absolute approval.
But it is in those moments where I can tell he is thinking and learning something new that I wonder about his thought process.
It is a completely unique experience to feel you know another human being from the inside out and yet they are still a complete mystery. I mean, this child GREW INSIDE ME! I literally felt him in my body and have known him more intimately and longer than anyone else on this planet will ever know him!
And even still, I don't know him at all.
Doesn't that tell us something? Doesn't that give us a clue that we are so much more than flesh and blood and personality? There is something beyond this world in each of us. Something deeper and more mysterious, wiser and more beautiful than we could ever understand.
I think it is a soul. But who knows how to really explain what it is.
I have a feeling that for the first time in my life, I'm really understanding what it is to love someone. What it is to love unconditionally, maybe the way we imagine God loves us.
Being a parent cracks your heart open and helps you to understand how precious each human life is, and how unique and mysterious we all actually are.
In the meantime, let me take a break from observing the divine to report that I cleaned up the most disgusting poop I've ever seen this morning. And it smelled like DEATH.
So that is the reality of parenting, brushing up against the great mystery of the divine spark in all of us, and the absolutely gross mundane reality of being human all at the same time.
Pretty cool.
xo
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